i know i shouldn't be blogging right now.
should be studying. Yes studying.
after i did so badly for all my papers.

i realised that the essay question is not as do-able as i how thought it was, there must be a hidden factor somewhere that i did not see.
compre was bad as usual i think. compre has never been my forte.
chem paper 3, well, the only subject that i have confident in.
i think that confidence has dropped to ground zero.
i screwed the paper up, totally.
math was worse than chem... much worse.
i don't think i can even pass, looking from the number of question i was stuck halfway and the number of questions that i didn't attempt at all.
oh my God. Math sucks.
i didn't have time to practice math at all, have to rely on paper two, which consist of 30% of pure maths. (I HATE PURE MATH!)
physics. hmmm, same as usual. don't have to report it already. physics is just so predictable.
so predictable that I AM GOING TO FAIL!
tmr's chem and friday is physics again.
next week, math and chem paper 1 and then i'm done.
DONE.
DONE with my LIFE as well.

i think it's the prelims. having these weird emotion.
mixture of fear, anxiousness, nervousness, anger, sadness.
all the feeling i can feel i suppose.
fear of not doing well.
nervour before every paper, nothing knowing whether i have studies enough.
anxious to get the papers over and done with.
anger at myself for not studying harder.
sadness because no matter how much effort i put it, it seems like i won't do well.
why is it that i'm not smart?
i just want a bit more brains.
Please God, give me some brains.

p.s. I am soooo not prepared for A levels. I wish i could turn back time. I promise i'll study harder.